Killing Doubtfire - Your 3 Best Weapons

OK Robin Williams fans, just to be clear, I’m not suggesting anyone kill our beloved Mork from Ork with this newsletter title.

I’m talking about that little, bitty fire of doubt that lives in your belly.

You know the one; it reminds you to play a little smaller, make decisions that are a little safer, live life a little more comfortably.

It usually lies dormant down there, a spark smoldering away just waiting for you to come up with some terrific, awesome, amazing, probably-a-little-scary idea to fuel its flame.

·      Maybe you’ve thought about quitting your job to pursue your passion.

·      Or you looked in the mirror and decided to finally get in shape.

·      I bet at one point or another you thought about travelling the world, right?

But then the little doubtfire starts to burn, filling your head with all sorts of reasons why you definitely should NOT follow that vision into reality.

How big is your doubtfire?

·      What if your passion doesn’t pay off and you fail miserably and humiliate yourself…?”

·      “How many times have you tried to get fit in the past and actually succeeded? Why would you put yourself through that again? You’re too inconsistent to exercise regularly and you hate getting up early. You might as well just grab that box of Entenmann’s donuts and sit back down on the couch where you belong…”

·      “How are you going to afford a trip around the world on your meager salary? And you’ll never get that much time off from work. Travelling internationally is really scary, plus you’re not smart enough to know how to navigate places where you don’t speak the language.”

WTF? Where did that voice come from to begin with?

And why on EARTH are we all so guilty of letting it guide our decision-making?

I guarantee that for most if not all of us, it started long, long ago, in a galaxy far, far away, called…


Yes. I said it.

We’re scarred for life from our childhood experiences. Even those of us from upper middle class suburban New York, like me.

We’ve all heard it before, right? How kids are like sponges, absorbing everything around them, all the stimuli, good or bad. What we don’t tend to hear though is that kids take all that information in and then use their tender young brains to interpret it all pretty much by themselves.

Without the benefit of life experience and spiritual growth, as kids we make up stories for how to manage our childhood life experiences. And then those stories become engrained in us. They turn into a tiny little ember of doubt, upon which all our future decisions will be measured.

Sounds awesome and uplifting right?

Well, here’s the good news.

Just because that fire has been smoldering and flaring up for most of your life, it doesn’t mean you have to buy into what it says is true in your life anymore.

Anytime you’re ready, you can just DECIDE to turn the hose on that sucker, throw the fire blanket over it and stamp it out once and for all.

And here’s how you do just that…

3 Ways to Kill a Doubtfire

1.    Pay attention to your thoughts. By noticing that doubtfire down there and hearing what it says to you, you’re putting yourself in the perfect position to take the power of those words away. Just like thieves getting caught in the night, lies and doubts don’t like to be seen for what they are, so by noticing that doubtful voice and saying, “hey! Asshole! I see you!” you’re acknowledging that what you’re hearing isn’t in alignment with who you REALLY are.

2.    Remind yourself what’s true. Just because your parents got divorced when you were little doesn’t really mean that you’re unlovable in life. That’s just the story the 10-year old you told yourself at the time to make sense of the situation. If your doubtfire is still reminding you of that story as if it’s gospel, school that sucker on what’s REALLY true in your life. Point to facts that support that you most certainly ARE lovable and replace that shitty doubt with some kick-ass proof.

3.    Take action to prove that doubtfire wrong. The fastest way to extinguish that flame is to take action that says to the world, “you know what? I’m NOT scared. I AM awesome. My dream CAN come true. And no one and nothing is going to get in my way.” Through committed decision-making and action that moves you in the direction of your BIG Vision in spite of the stupid doubtfire, you declare to the world that this IS your path, no matter what. And with consistency of those committed actions, that doubtfire has no other choice but to try and shout louder and louder until it finally burns itself out because it simply can’t match your persistence.

Alright, now I want to hear from you.

What’s your doubtfire been saying to you lately?

And what’s the first step you’re going to take to put it out?

Tell us in the comments below.

As always, I’m so honored that you’re here reading this today. If you feel like what you’re finding at is helpful, I’d be even more honored if you’d “like” and share with your friends. We all need some inspiration every now and then, right?

With love and inspiration (and an empty fire extinguisher on the floor beside me),


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